[Blue has come to be very keen on kisses, turns out. granted, he had Jim of all people to sell him on the idea at the onset, leaving a very strong first impression. still, the novelty has yet to fade, and has instead only become something to want more of as things have gotten dire. aside from Finn, he won't be getting the comfort of a shared mental connection, will he? but a kiss...it does scratch a similar itch.
that said, roaming hands are stalled for a bit while he imposes on Yzak's mouth a little longer, but eventually he does return to it, pressing palm and fingers against his side, hesitating only with the thought to ask--]
[ Sore? Good question. Since everything changed, it's been pretty rough-and-tumble - from the very start in Yzak's case what with his immediate, unlucky wrong place at the wrong time run-in with those rock dragons. On top of today's rather uneventful search that he might have stretched out a little longer than he should have because he wanted to find something, there's more overall fatigue than specific soreness set in him. There's a couple of areas of his body that have been bruised up by now from maneuvering about outside, a couple of small cuts here and there, but aside from his face... ]
Maybe just a bit there, near your hand. [ He lets out a tiny, thoughtful noise against Blue's mouth, and just above his left hand paused is where he slammed himself while getting away from those rock dragons so he didn't end up in a worse state. The bruising is deeper from the impact, the area slightly swollen. ] But it's not that bad. [ At least, not enough that it's hindered him beyond maybe aggravating him if he moved in his sleep wrong. He might not have considered it at all if Blue hadn't asked.
He slides his own hand around Blue's shoulders up to rest at the back of his neck, warm. He gives a gentle little squeeze, encouraging him on. ]
[feeling Yzak's fingers back on his neck triggers a tingling wave of pleasure down his spine. he really like that, and coupled with a kiss? very nice indeed.]
If I shiver again...it's not because I'm cold. [goosebumps - good goosebumps.
that said, while their kiss grows more intimate, Blue's hand drifts away from the bruised spot on his side. fingers slip under his pants' waistline while trailing along to feel for fasteners.]
[ Well if Yzak was really that gung-ho about not getting worked up even though that little challenge passed the moment Blue asked for permission to touch him, that'd be flying out the window the moment he feels fingers move down to work at his pants. It ... doesn't take much for him when he decides to not hold himself back, especially not now, when this is absolutely something he's been wondering about since that night of their dream. That, on top of Blue's eagerness causes little pulses of heat to run through Yzak, following those wandering fingers from his side and down to his waistline. ]
Mmmnh... Noted.
[ Along with the awkward little clearing of his throat, there's a touch of hesitance there, still ever present. Because this isn't a dream anymore. This pull he feels toward Blue is only getting stronger, and with that the ingrained, involuntary backlash kicks in. It's ... a little weaker now, than it was at the beginning, because when actually backed into a corner (by feelings) with no other choice, one has to work their already over-thinking brain to reconcile what they're facing. His feelings in the now aren't as clouded by doubt, but the (unsure) (unsure? definitely bad, don't try to make it sound less bad) future is always so close that it can never truly be ignored. Yzak wants to enjoy this now without issue, so he's ... trying to keep it back (it's just gonna hurt more later) - keep it from getting too loud (the deeper you go) (you should have done what you've always done so you could go back home and do it properly without all of these problems) (but there's nobody quite like this back there, is there...?) (oh poor you).
Everything now helps with that effort. Blue's lips for sure, Yzak parting his own to slide his tongue between his. He feels his face grow hot at the action - one perk to Yzak's easy flustered embarrassment here in reality is that it also takes up part of his mind now. His hips shift to help Blue along, and though there are only a couple of fastens, Yzak is the type of person who makes sure every fasten is fastened! Belt properly looped and secured as well.
At least it's not a puzzle like Blue's dress was for him. ]
[indeed not, but it will take time, because Yzak's tongue is a pleasant distraction, but distraction nonetheless; Yzak will have to endure a bit of delightful torment while those pants of his get tighter.
there's another distraction on deck: those doubts. as each one bubbles into perception, Blue presses in again to try and assuage them, shifting to sit up without relying on his other hand for balance so he can bring it to Yzak's cheek, cupping it tenderly.]
It's okay right now. Yzak. And that's all we have. It's okay to keep, isn't it?
[ That torment would be rude if Blue wasn't otherwise so kind. Because it's that compassion that can easily make everything else seem that much ... less important. Odd that right now that's a mix of both stimulation and negative buzz in his mind that those words are crashing against.
Hearing his name, feeling that hand on his face, Yzak breaks the kiss, though he doesn't pull away, staring into his eyes as those words turn around in his head. He knows that well enough, that nothing, not even tomorrow, is promised. Not even to him. But maybe that's also why he hates it a little bit. So to what Blue says... ]
...
...of course it's okay.
[ How could having, keeping this moment, all of these last month's moments not be? He looks down with a twinge of apology, because he doesn't like! Ruining! Things!
But there's also the knowledge that despite the agreement, he's still pretty selfish. He wants to have, and he wants to keep, and he wants to not have to let it go or even consider the possibility. Because he's lost a lot already, so he grabs and hangs on that much tighter to the things and people that remain, afraid to lose them too.
[Blue can understand those doubts, endless though they may seem. they're a part of Yzak, and he accepts them just as much as he accepts everything else laid bare to him. he opens his eyes, expression soft, face flushed, lips wet. that's all Yzak's doing.
it hurts, knowing he can't promise anything more than right now, but it makes it all the more important to be present in that right now. so he closes his eyes and presses in another kiss.
down below, Blue's got the fasteners taken care of, but he needs Yzak to cooperate to get his clothes off enough to expose his erection. he'll ask for that in thought - as if it needs asking! - and tenderly clutch at his bare hips while that's happening.]
[ It's rough to simultaneously be used to death and so attached to what it always threatens to take from him. The kiss helps pull Yzak a little more out of it, as he tries to mentally shake himself back to the task at hand. Be present in that right now. He was totally into it before those thoughts slithered their way in, so he tries to get them to fuck off (and probably, literally thinks fuck off in the process toward them) as he too shuts his eye and indulges in that kiss to let it pull him back the rest of the way.
He obliges Blue's request, lifting his hips some and reaching a hand down - he's not so keen right now to get everything off completely, it's still cold. But he'll get them down enough, giving Blue the room he needs to touch him.
The movement shifts some of the blanket and it slides from his shoulders, though... the cold is pretty back there in terms of immediate priority right now. ]
[he remembers it very well - that dream of theirs. how could he forget? moreover, he remembers the impression of Yzak's hand on him, how that dream impressed the intensity and value of that moment.
he wants Yzak to have it again. the both of them, really, but...Yzak...
Blue hums against his mouth as fingers gingerly feel around for and take hold of his cock, mindful of the response and adjusting accordingly.]
[ It doesn't even take a complete hold - the moment Yzak feels his fingertips so much as graze him, he pulls in a fast, deep breath against Blue's mouth. When those fingers more fully curl around him, he feels his abdomen tighten in response, powerful warmth shooting through him as lets that breath out as a low groan.
His own fingers at the back of Blue's neck coil some as he slides that hand forward, down the side of his neck. He recalls Blue's voice in his head the last time, straightforward and lacking the coyness that Yzak himself feels too strongly sometimes. How good it felt when he touched him, how much he wanted him too, how he wanted more. He feels the same now, though his own reservedness keeps those thoughts between that place of being formed and actively putting them forward. They're still clear and completely perceivable, he's just ... bad at outright saying these sorts of things. Which is also a thought he can't help but have, like the (somewhat envious of Blue's ability to just SAY those things) nerd he is. ]
[ He feels his face heat up at the request, heart already pounding hard enough thanks to every sensation that flutters through his body - some small, some bigger, causing him to shudder helplessly in response - due to Blue's hand working his dick. He leans back, head tipping down as his own hand on his neck moves down over his chest. ]
So far it's ... you're fine. You're— good.
[ He breathes out a moan, shaky. After a couple of more strokes, though, that hand drops lower to lightly cover Blue's, letting him still take the initiative, lead, only squeezing or guiding if he feels he has to (which he doesn't! much!) He squints slightly, though, when he does that. ]
My depth perception right now ... is so fucked up.
[ Dilemma, because despite the depth-perception thing, Yzak's kind of into watching Blue work him over like this. Trying to take note of every little movement, every stroke he takes on his own that isn't simply an echo of what was done for him last time.
But the squeeze causes him to hunch forward some and shut his eyes anyway, eliciting a louder, deeper groan out of him as he rests his temple against Blue's. He pushes his hips up in response, needily asking for more of that as his hand over Blue's also squeezes to emphasize. After that, he'll pull the hand away to brace it next to himself. The other hand slips under Blue's shirt, lifting it some as his arm curls around his back with a controlled sort of gentleness. ]
More ... of that...
[ He pants out, a please slipping out with it as he shivers. ]
[if Yzak's neediness wasn't exciting enough, the hand sneaking up on him comes as a surprise that prompts a soft, startled sound. his mouth twitches in a small, breathless smile, because he's still caught up in the waves of wanting radiating off of him.
with a little laugh in his voice:] Alright.
[more of that, then, challenging himself to not get distracted by any errant fingers on him while he works, finding he holds his breath here and there while anticipating Yzak hitting that euphoric high. being able to elicit this kind of reaction is a kind of high in of itself for Blue, who has been feeling himself falling more and more into obsolescence with the state of his body. being able to...bring something other than anguish...
[ The warmth building up in his body only gets hotter as Blue edges him toward his peak. In such a desolate, foreign place, Yzak's senses try to grasp at the familiar within it, all of which is just Blue. From the way he breathes in his scent with every intake of air as his breaths grow shorter, deeper, more impassioned. The soft, charmed tone of his voice in his ear. The tender feeling of his skin beneath his fingertips. How in this dark room only lit by a fire that's started to wane some, Blue is the only thing he can really - all he wants to see. His lips part to taste him, too, as he presses a heavy kiss to his neck, just over his pulse point. Even the way he can hear him, feel him in his mind is something Yzak finds himself reaching for.
He pushes into Blue's hand harder, impatient, more desperately until that climax finally courses through his body. Yzak shudders, and when he comes, it takes a surprising amount of self control that even he'll be shocked he has in this moment to twist his wrist and ball his hand into a fist rather than grab and dig fingers and nails into Blue's back, because that would have been hard. And the way his arm tightens its embrace around him is a pretty good indicator of that (though it's also careful). He doesn't care to muffle those last few, loud moans that taper off into breath-catching gasps once it's all out of him and he feels himself slowly (reluctantly) coming down from it. ]
[it does sting a little, sensing his restraint, knowing even in the throes of passion, he has to be mindful to not hurt him. but this is reality, not a comfortable dream. even so, Blue shares in the emotional thrill of his coming, sighing in the midst of Yzak's moaning, feeling him tense and release in his hand. he relaxes and releases him, fingers sticky.
he hums a soft sound, tilting his head to gently nuzzle Yzak's for a moment before lifting it back so his neck and shoulder are still comfortable perches for him.]
[ Though many of his other traits would appear to differ, Yzak can be a respectful gentleman since he doesn't wish to hurt someone he cares about. Cares about a lot. Cares about this much. (he's really in it now, isn't he) He'd have felt ten times as bad otherwise - ironic, that hands as bloodied as his try so hard not to do harm here.
He doesn't need as much support as he unclenches both hands - the other still braced at his side, it's probably not surprising that recovery is swifter for him. Thankfully, the echoes of those feelings do take their time, still lingering in his body. He leans back to look at Blue, face crimson, expression gentle, pleased, yet still holding that intensity Yzak always has in how focused it is on him. The bandage on his face, though still secure, has shifted just the tiniest bit, but he doesn't seem to note it. Still warmed all over to not note the cold of the night (they're both going to hate when it does set back in later). ]
... that was... different. [ He breathes out first, a beat passing before he amends, confirms. ]
Good. No, better.
Y-you know what I mean.
[ Though Blue surely picked up on some things from Yzak himself, the sensation of someone else touching him like this feels like a different thing entirely. ]
[ He leans into it, still wishing to feel and relish in every little touch Blue offers.
Yzak feels his face heat up more at the remark, sputtering in response, desperately trying not to but he's so absolutely helplessly weak to this sort of thing, feeling his chest get light. And he can't even counter it properly with anything close to that smooth, that straightforward. ]
Like ... you can talk...!
[ God that was stupid, even if it's what he essentially thinks about him too. He ducks his head some, muttering. ]
I guess you can, just saying something like that so easily...
[the smile warms, endlessly endeared by Yzak's particular kind of fluster. he won't let him shy away for too long, curling a finger under his chin to coax him to look back up.]
I can also say...I am grateful. I can share feelings...and a moment like this. With you.
[sincerity that continues to just bulldoze Yzak's cool-guy walls is punctuated with a gentle kiss that gradually deepens in an effort to impress that very sincerity onto him. that seems to be key with humans, securing that trust - trust that doesn't come from the resonance of minds, but of bodies and hearts.]
[ Not much of a wall there when you're not very cool in the first place.
His chest only feels lighter when he has no choice but to look back into those eyes, hear those words that set so deeply into his heart that he can't help but simultaneously feel pulled in more and frightened of that pull. He's not going to be able to turn away from it at all soon.
But does he want to in the first place? No, he hasn't from the beginning. But the path before him still seems so endless, while when he looks behind him, he's so far in that he can't see the start of it anymore. He keeps facing forward.
Yzak shuts his eye, accepting that impression of sincerity and thinking I am, too as he returns both Blue's sentiments and kiss. He can stay, doing this for a long time (just as Blue said himself, before), but right now, with those words still fresh in his mind, his body still feeling so good and so warm, he wants to do more. With Blue. For Blue. Only you. He breaks the kiss and reaches to take his hand, pulling it up to press his lips gently against the back of it. ]
H-here. [ And then he tugs at that hand, urging Blue to move along with him - easing him back, intent to see more of him, taste more of him, more than just his lips and his neck. He'll let Blue decide where he's most comfortable, sitting up against the wall? On his back? Yzak's the more flexible one here. But once settled, he slides his hands back up under Blue's shirt to bring it up, while he slides his own body down, leaning in to kiss lightly just under his (very ... noticeable) ribs. ]
[the kiss to his hand is such a strange, but endearing because of the source of it. and so much for Yzak's efforts in more efficient blanket management, because that gets all disheveled on the way down onto his back, fresh goosebumps surfacing as his skin is exposed to the open air and Yzak's lips.
despite efforts to stifle himself, Blue grunts in discomfort, holding up a hand when alarm rears its head.]
It's...alright. Just--help me situate, please. [because laying back this put his legs in an awkward position, so he just needs to adjust that.] ...There... [he exhales, flashing Yzak a reassuring smile, reaching to touch his face again.]
Not really something to think about...in a good dream...
Yeah. Of course. [ Funny how affection like this can override impatience that always seems so set in him. He briefly eases back, letting Blue get comfortable, reaching out if he can help. He didtry to keep blanket management efficient, at the very least making sure one is between Blue's back and the mattress and opting to give him priority to them since he hasn't gotten nearly as cold.
Yzak looks back up at him when he caresses his face. ]
I'd much rather have this than a dream.
[ He states that with the matter-of-fact tone he usually takes. And that'd even sound smooth but of course he immediately ruins it when he eases back toward him, tentative hand moving to rest at his bared waist as he mutters, pink. ]
I - I've just never done any of this before! So ... bear with me and tell me if I fuck something up. Or if I'm not... doing something right. Enough. Aaaagh you know what I mean!
[there's a gentle laugh in his breath as he lays back, the warmth of being so cared for and wanted taking precedence over bodily discomforts for now.]
What a coincidence...neither have I! [he exhales, relaxing back against Yzak's jacket and the blanket, fingers grazing at what bit of Yzak he can reach from here.]
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[Blue has come to be very keen on kisses, turns out. granted, he had Jim of all people to sell him on the idea at the onset, leaving a very strong first impression. still, the novelty has yet to fade, and has instead only become something to want more of as things have gotten dire. aside from Finn, he won't be getting the comfort of a shared mental connection, will he? but a kiss...it does scratch a similar itch.
that said, roaming hands are stalled for a bit while he imposes on Yzak's mouth a little longer, but eventually he does return to it, pressing palm and fingers against his side, hesitating only with the thought to ask--]
Where are you sore? So I don't hurt you.
hell yeA 🍌
Maybe just a bit there, near your hand. [ He lets out a tiny, thoughtful noise against Blue's mouth, and just above his left hand paused is where he slammed himself while getting away from those rock dragons so he didn't end up in a worse state. The bruising is deeper from the impact, the area slightly swollen. ] But it's not that bad. [ At least, not enough that it's hindered him beyond maybe aggravating him if he moved in his sleep wrong. He might not have considered it at all if Blue hadn't asked.
He slides his own hand around Blue's shoulders up to rest at the back of his neck, warm. He gives a gentle little squeeze, encouraging him on. ]
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If I shiver again...it's not because I'm cold. [goosebumps - good goosebumps.
that said, while their kiss grows more intimate, Blue's hand drifts away from the bruised spot on his side. fingers slip under his pants' waistline while trailing along to feel for fasteners.]
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Mmmnh... Noted.
[ Along with the awkward little clearing of his throat, there's a touch of hesitance there, still ever present. Because this isn't a dream anymore. This pull he feels toward Blue is only getting stronger, and with that the ingrained, involuntary backlash kicks in. It's ... a little weaker now, than it was at the beginning, because when actually backed into a corner (by feelings) with no other choice, one has to work their already over-thinking brain to reconcile what they're facing. His feelings in the now aren't as clouded by doubt, but the (unsure) (unsure? definitely bad, don't try to make it sound less bad) future is always so close that it can never truly be ignored. Yzak wants to enjoy this now without issue, so he's ... trying to keep it back (it's just gonna hurt more later) - keep it from getting too loud (the deeper you go) (you should have done what you've always done so you could go back home and do it properly without all of these problems) (but there's nobody quite like this back there, is there...?) (oh poor you).
Everything now helps with that effort. Blue's lips for sure, Yzak parting his own to slide his tongue between his. He feels his face grow hot at the action - one perk to Yzak's easy flustered embarrassment here in reality is that it also takes up part of his mind now. His hips shift to help Blue along, and though there are only a couple of fastens, Yzak is the type of person who makes sure every fasten is fastened! Belt properly looped and secured as well.
At least it's not a puzzle like Blue's dress was for him. ]
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there's another distraction on deck: those doubts. as each one bubbles into perception, Blue presses in again to try and assuage them, shifting to sit up without relying on his other hand for balance so he can bring it to Yzak's cheek, cupping it tenderly.]
It's okay right now. Yzak. And that's all we have. It's okay to keep, isn't it?
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Hearing his name, feeling that hand on his face, Yzak breaks the kiss, though he doesn't pull away, staring into his eyes as those words turn around in his head. He knows that well enough, that nothing, not even tomorrow, is promised. Not even to him. But maybe that's also why he hates it a little bit. So to what Blue says... ]
...
...of course it's okay.
[ How could having, keeping this moment, all of these last month's moments not be? He looks down with a twinge of apology, because he doesn't like! Ruining! Things!
But there's also the knowledge that despite the agreement, he's still pretty selfish. He wants to have, and he wants to keep, and he wants to not have to let it go or even consider the possibility. Because he's lost a lot already, so he grabs and hangs on that much tighter to the things and people that remain, afraid to lose them too.
He's ... trying his hardest to focus on now. ]
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it hurts, knowing he can't promise anything more than right now, but it makes it all the more important to be present in that right now. so he closes his eyes and presses in another kiss.
down below, Blue's got the fasteners taken care of, but he needs Yzak to cooperate to get his clothes off enough to expose his erection. he'll ask for that in thought - as if it needs asking! - and tenderly clutch at his bare hips while that's happening.]
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He obliges Blue's request, lifting his hips some and reaching a hand down - he's not so keen right now to get everything off completely, it's still cold. But he'll get them down enough, giving Blue the room he needs to touch him.
The movement shifts some of the blanket and it slides from his shoulders, though... the cold is pretty back there in terms of immediate priority right now. ]
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he wants Yzak to have it again. the both of them, really, but...Yzak...
Blue hums against his mouth as fingers gingerly feel around for and take hold of his cock, mindful of the response and adjusting accordingly.]
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His own fingers at the back of Blue's neck coil some as he slides that hand forward, down the side of his neck. He recalls Blue's voice in his head the last time, straightforward and lacking the coyness that Yzak himself feels too strongly sometimes. How good it felt when he touched him, how much he wanted him too, how he wanted more. He feels the same now, though his own reservedness keeps those thoughts between that place of being formed and actively putting them forward. They're still clear and completely perceivable, he's just ... bad at outright saying these sorts of things. Which is also a thought he can't help but have, like the (somewhat envious of Blue's ability to just SAY those things) nerd he is. ]
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sure would be a shame if he COULDN'T convey those things so easily anymore huh.]Your fingers...on my neck... Are always so nice.
[he kisses the corner of his mouth, letting Yzak catch his breath while he's subject to Blue's testing, teasing touch and grip.]
Tell me...how much, how fast...so it's exactly what you want.
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wOW][ He feels his face heat up at the request, heart already pounding hard enough thanks to every sensation that flutters through his body - some small, some bigger, causing him to shudder helplessly in response - due to Blue's hand working his dick. He leans back, head tipping down as his own hand on his neck moves down over his chest. ]
So far it's ... you're fine. You're— good.
[ He breathes out a moan, shaky. After a couple of more strokes, though, that hand drops lower to lightly cover Blue's, letting him still take the initiative, lead, only squeezing or guiding if he feels he has to (which he doesn't! much!) He squints slightly, though, when he does that. ]
My depth perception right now ... is so fucked up.
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he kisses his cheek before gently bumping him temple to temple, affectionate.]
Close your eyes, then. [the thought is something of a teasing purr as he squeezes a bit of his own volition.]
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But the squeeze causes him to hunch forward some and shut his eyes anyway, eliciting a louder, deeper groan out of him as he rests his temple against Blue's. He pushes his hips up in response, needily asking for more of that as his hand over Blue's also squeezes to emphasize. After that, he'll pull the hand away to brace it next to himself. The other hand slips under Blue's shirt, lifting it some as his arm curls around his back with a controlled sort of gentleness. ]
More ... of that...
[ He pants out, a please slipping out with it as he shivers. ]
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with a little laugh in his voice:] Alright.
[more of that, then, challenging himself to not get distracted by any errant fingers on him while he works, finding he holds his breath here and there while anticipating Yzak hitting that euphoric high. being able to elicit this kind of reaction is a kind of high in of itself for Blue, who has been feeling himself falling more and more into obsolescence with the state of his body. being able to...bring something other than anguish...
thank goodness for this.]
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He pushes into Blue's hand harder, impatient, more desperately until that climax finally courses through his body. Yzak shudders, and when he comes, it takes a surprising amount of self control that even he'll be shocked he has in this moment to twist his wrist and ball his hand into a fist rather than grab and dig fingers and nails into Blue's back, because that would have been hard. And the way his arm tightens its embrace around him is a pretty good indicator of that (though it's also careful). He doesn't care to muffle those last few, loud moans that taper off into breath-catching gasps once it's all out of him and he feels himself slowly (reluctantly) coming down from it. ]
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he hums a soft sound, tilting his head to gently nuzzle Yzak's for a moment before lifting it back so his neck and shoulder are still comfortable perches for him.]
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He doesn't need as much support as he unclenches both hands - the other still braced at his side, it's probably not surprising that recovery is swifter for him. Thankfully, the echoes of those feelings do take their time, still lingering in his body. He leans back to look at Blue, face crimson, expression gentle, pleased, yet still holding that intensity Yzak always has in how focused it is on him. The bandage on his face, though still secure, has shifted just the tiniest bit, but he doesn't seem to note it. Still warmed all over to not note the cold of the night (they're both going to hate when it does set back in later). ]
... that was... different. [ He breathes out first, a beat passing before he amends, confirms. ]
Good. No, better.
Y-you know what I mean.
[ Though Blue surely picked up on some things from Yzak himself, the sensation of someone else touching him like this feels like a different thing entirely. ]
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[he shifts his weight so he can bring his clean hand back up to Yzak's face, sweeping stray hair away from his cheek.]
You glow...like this. It's beautiful.
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Yzak feels his face heat up more at the remark, sputtering in response, desperately trying not to but he's so absolutely helplessly weak to this sort of thing, feeling his chest get light. And he can't even counter it properly with anything close to that smooth, that straightforward. ]
Like ... you can talk...!
[ God that was stupid, even if it's what he essentially thinks about him too. He ducks his head some, muttering. ]
I guess you can, just saying something like that so easily...
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I can also say...I am grateful. I can share feelings...and a moment like this. With you.
[sincerity that continues to just bulldoze Yzak's cool-guy walls is punctuated with a gentle kiss that gradually deepens in an effort to impress that very sincerity onto him. that seems to be key with humans, securing that trust - trust that doesn't come from the resonance of minds, but of bodies and hearts.]
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His chest only feels lighter when he has no choice but to look back into those eyes, hear those words that set so deeply into his heart that he can't help but simultaneously feel pulled in more and frightened of that pull. He's not going to be able to turn away from it at all soon.
But does he want to in the first place? No, he hasn't from the beginning. But the path before him still seems so endless, while when he looks behind him, he's so far in that he can't see the start of it anymore. He keeps facing forward.
Yzak shuts his eye, accepting that impression of sincerity and thinking I am, too as he returns both Blue's sentiments and kiss. He can stay, doing this for a long time (just as Blue said himself, before), but right now, with those words still fresh in his mind, his body still feeling so good and so warm, he wants to do more. With Blue. For Blue. Only you. He breaks the kiss and reaches to take his hand, pulling it up to press his lips gently against the back of it. ]
H-here. [ And then he tugs at that hand, urging Blue to move along with him - easing him back, intent to see more of him, taste more of him, more than just his lips and his neck. He'll let Blue decide where he's most comfortable, sitting up against the wall? On his back? Yzak's the more flexible one here. But once settled, he slides his hands back up under Blue's shirt to bring it up, while he slides his own body down, leaning in to kiss lightly just under his (very ... noticeable) ribs. ]
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despite efforts to stifle himself, Blue grunts in discomfort, holding up a hand when alarm rears its head.]
It's...alright. Just--help me situate, please. [because laying back this put his legs in an awkward position, so he just needs to adjust that.] ...There... [he exhales, flashing Yzak a reassuring smile, reaching to touch his face again.]
Not really something to think about...in a good dream...
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Yzak looks back up at him when he caresses his face. ]
I'd much rather have this than a dream.
[ He states that with the matter-of-fact tone he usually takes. And that'd even sound smooth but of course he immediately ruins it when he eases back toward him, tentative hand moving to rest at his bared waist as he mutters, pink. ]
I - I've just never done any of this before! So ... bear with me and tell me if I fuck something up. Or if I'm not... doing something right. Enough. Aaaagh you know what I mean!
I want ... you to feel good, to be happy, too.
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What a coincidence...neither have I! [he exhales, relaxing back against Yzak's jacket and the blanket, fingers grazing at what bit of Yzak he can reach from here.]
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