[the smile warms, endlessly endeared by Yzak's particular kind of fluster. he won't let him shy away for too long, curling a finger under his chin to coax him to look back up.]
I can also say...I am grateful. I can share feelings...and a moment like this. With you.
[sincerity that continues to just bulldoze Yzak's cool-guy walls is punctuated with a gentle kiss that gradually deepens in an effort to impress that very sincerity onto him. that seems to be key with humans, securing that trust - trust that doesn't come from the resonance of minds, but of bodies and hearts.]
[ Not much of a wall there when you're not very cool in the first place.
His chest only feels lighter when he has no choice but to look back into those eyes, hear those words that set so deeply into his heart that he can't help but simultaneously feel pulled in more and frightened of that pull. He's not going to be able to turn away from it at all soon.
But does he want to in the first place? No, he hasn't from the beginning. But the path before him still seems so endless, while when he looks behind him, he's so far in that he can't see the start of it anymore. He keeps facing forward.
Yzak shuts his eye, accepting that impression of sincerity and thinking I am, too as he returns both Blue's sentiments and kiss. He can stay, doing this for a long time (just as Blue said himself, before), but right now, with those words still fresh in his mind, his body still feeling so good and so warm, he wants to do more. With Blue. For Blue. Only you. He breaks the kiss and reaches to take his hand, pulling it up to press his lips gently against the back of it. ]
H-here. [ And then he tugs at that hand, urging Blue to move along with him - easing him back, intent to see more of him, taste more of him, more than just his lips and his neck. He'll let Blue decide where he's most comfortable, sitting up against the wall? On his back? Yzak's the more flexible one here. But once settled, he slides his hands back up under Blue's shirt to bring it up, while he slides his own body down, leaning in to kiss lightly just under his (very ... noticeable) ribs. ]
[the kiss to his hand is such a strange, but endearing because of the source of it. and so much for Yzak's efforts in more efficient blanket management, because that gets all disheveled on the way down onto his back, fresh goosebumps surfacing as his skin is exposed to the open air and Yzak's lips.
despite efforts to stifle himself, Blue grunts in discomfort, holding up a hand when alarm rears its head.]
It's...alright. Just--help me situate, please. [because laying back this put his legs in an awkward position, so he just needs to adjust that.] ...There... [he exhales, flashing Yzak a reassuring smile, reaching to touch his face again.]
Not really something to think about...in a good dream...
Yeah. Of course. [ Funny how affection like this can override impatience that always seems so set in him. He briefly eases back, letting Blue get comfortable, reaching out if he can help. He didtry to keep blanket management efficient, at the very least making sure one is between Blue's back and the mattress and opting to give him priority to them since he hasn't gotten nearly as cold.
Yzak looks back up at him when he caresses his face. ]
I'd much rather have this than a dream.
[ He states that with the matter-of-fact tone he usually takes. And that'd even sound smooth but of course he immediately ruins it when he eases back toward him, tentative hand moving to rest at his bared waist as he mutters, pink. ]
I - I've just never done any of this before! So ... bear with me and tell me if I fuck something up. Or if I'm not... doing something right. Enough. Aaaagh you know what I mean!
[there's a gentle laugh in his breath as he lays back, the warmth of being so cared for and wanted taking precedence over bodily discomforts for now.]
What a coincidence...neither have I! [he exhales, relaxing back against Yzak's jacket and the blanket, fingers grazing at what bit of Yzak he can reach from here.]
[ He'll have some within reach, as when he returns to his actions, still careful, still light enough with his touch without being too light, one hand moves back up to continue lifting Blue's shirt with it.
The hand at his waist slides lower, fingers gently caressing over his hip bone, lingering much like his lips do when he returns to re-press a warm kiss beneath, and then slowly, very slowly, up his ribs, wishing to feel, please, know every part of Blue. ]
[Yzak's wishes mingle with Blue's own, shivering with delight under the attention. little sighs and stifled whimpers intensify as time goes on in this way, until Blue's body responds without his immediate say, hips trying to lift against him.]
[ He lets out a low, affirming sound against Blue's skin in response to his voice, feeling that push against him. Yzak feels his lips twitch, pleased by the action, as he kisses up to chest while that accompanying hand wanders more curiously, intimately, fingers feeling, splaying over his skin.
He doesn't want to drag this on for too long lest Blue starts to tire. Truth be told, he's feeling a bit impatient himself. The little noises and gasps of breath coming from Blue are both something he wants to hear as much as possible and something that coaxes Yzak to give him what he wants.
So the hand resting at his hip slips forward and lower, eye raising to peek at Blue and watch his reaction when that hand singly starts to undo the front of his pants. ]
[the air is chill, but Yzak is warm; each kiss or touch leaves a trail of tingling comfort to combat that chill. he can brace and hold an expectant breath, going still while his pants are undone, shifting up when they’re pulled at… he lets out that breath in a sigh when his erection is free, shuddering again.
he relaxes, face flush and expression hazy, toeing the line between exhaustion and expectation. it’s one thing to have felt those feelings emotionally alone, but it’s another to be subject to what the body brings to that table: that ache, the fluttering of his stomach, the racing of his heart…all amplified in simply opening dewy eyes to see Yzak again.]
[ Ah, that's definitely nice - being this close and feeling Blue's heartrate pick up the way it does. Yzak feels a good deal of self-satisfaction to be the cause of it, of all of this, from the way he sighs out that breath, to how hard he is, to the way he trembles slightly in anticipation. But more than that he realizes he like to see Blue feel good, enjoy something like this because so much of what he's learned about him has been the opposite.
Yzak shifts as he moves and kisses back down Blue's body, over his abdomen and finally down to his dick. Taking it in his hand, he gives him a couple of full, slow strokes. And then with some fluster and small beat of timidness, of self-appraisal, he presses parted lips and tongue against it. Of course, said self-appraisal is because like Yzak said earlier, he's definitely never done this! And never betraying who he is, he wants to be good at everything he does. ]
[Blue would comment on Yzak's good sense to be pleased with himself, but what is he--
oh.]
Ah...!
[the sensation of Yzak's mouth on him sends a stronger rush of urgency that is startling...and thrilling. it takes his breath away, makes his skin prickle and his dick ache. why in heaven's name was he apprehensive a moment ago? did he know this would have such a reaction?
after a bit of eye fluttering and a caught breath:] Oh, that... Incredible...!
[ He expected a reaction for sure, but not quite like that. So Yzak, too, is startled, picking his head up to look at Blue. Those sounds, that face ... if Yzak hadn't gone first, this would have driven him over the edge. Holy shit. He feels like some kind of wizard for getting a reaction like that - and from one, short movement. mister dick wizard here
He immediately wants more of that. So without needing to be urged back to it, Yzak's head dips back down to repeat that first motion in the same place. Lips and tongue linger for longer this time, before moving them down Blue's dick and listening intently for a response. That's what he aims for first, noting what evokes the most impassioned noises out of him. Be it a certain way he moves his tongue or how softly he presses his lips against skin. But through that, he recalls what he said earlier, about wanting to know if he's doing too much or too little, or if it's... ]
Enough?
[ Is it?
Ah, they can communicate while he does this, too. That's ... a little less cute than the smooching thing. ]
[it's probably a bit dramatic, but...well, this is new. and important. and informed by not just his own feelings and responses, but Yzak's own intentions. it's a lot.
it's very good, though, though it does make for some scattered thoughts while he's in the trenches here.]
So warm...all over... And when you press-- [his breath hitches with a whimper, forearms lifting and fingers curling for lack of any other thing they can do.]
Is this...really...what it's like...?
[gee i dunno Blue you are kind of in it right now. and even though it starts to become a struggle to be taking more labored breaths, and even though his head is starting to ache as this goes on. it can't go on for too long, though.]
[ Yzak is all about the dramatic, which is probably why he liked that all the more himself.
Hurry. He knows what Blue means by that plead (as hot as it'd be otherwise). The way he squirms and moans against the way Yzak works his mouth is a pretty good indicator that he can't be far off from climax. So,
And when you press
he defers to what he managed to pick up as coaxing the best reactions out of Blue, to give him what he wants here. He lets out an affirmative little ahh in response to his ask, breath hot against the head of Blue's cock. Doing as enjoyed, Yzak presses lips and tongue back against him, pulling them down and very lightly sucking at his skin. His hand, too, occasionally gives a soft, urging squeeze, stroking down and then back up to glide his thumb over the tip of the head and repeat. ]
[even if he wanted to stop himself, he's past that point when one more stroke, one more suck renders resistance futile. Blue succumbs before he can warn him, overtaken by the rush that comes with a gasp and a slight arching of his back, held for a beat before he can exhale and untense in its subsiding. his heart still drums and his head still swims, and his body trembles, awash in that pulsing satisfaction that makes the dream pale in comparison.
few things compare to the real thing, after all.
is it...really this intense? always? it's...overwhelming; rarely has Blue felt so vulnerable in being laid bare and exposed to someone, but that has always been emotionally, mentally. not like this. there's layers here he's not known before, not even in dreaming first- or second-hand.
intense...and so strangely fleeting, even when glimmers of that sensation linger under his skin and ache as they do.]
[ His hand stays in place gripped around Blue's cock as he rides out his orgasm, hardly needing a warning when the way he heaved in that gasp was telling enough. Telling and delightful to hear, just as delightful to see and feel the way he tenses and then trembles. He was tempted, so tempted to keep Blue in his mouth more, right then, but as it stands Yzak can only be so brave this first time. Imagine his humility if he got too full of himself and ended up choking or something? He'd expire on the spot. Still, the intrigue for more is there now.
Yzak lifts his head, hand wet down and between a couple of his fingers (begrudgingly) letting go of Blue. He gives the side of his leg a small, grateful squeeze as he pushes, braces himself with a hand to half sit up, gazing up to Blue and giving him a moment to catch his breath. He feels somewhat entranced when he watches that, the rise and fall of his chest slowing as he calms. ]
[he is a sight, isn't he? disheveled, still mostly dressed yet rumpled from where roaming hands and kisses were left; his face is flush and expression dazed, eyes half-open and mouth parted.
eventually he does feel Yzak's attention on him (when has it left?!), his arms reach out for him.]
[ A sight enough that what Blue said earlier about him echoes in Yzak's mind; glowing, beautiful. Both feeling like understatements to describe the form before him.
Drawn in by those arms, he sits up completely between Blue's legs, feeling a twinge at his side when he twists slightly in a certain way. But ignoring it for what he'd rather feel instead, Yzak's careful as he crawls up and into those arms, one of his own bracing so he doesn't put his full weight down when he does. The chill of the night is going to set in again, they need to rebundle up for it, but right now he just wants to feel this for the tiniest bit longer. He dips his head down closer to stare at Blue. ]
How are you feeling?
[ A double sided question. The care in that thought, though, makes it clear that Yzak's priority is Blue himself rather than what they just did. ]
[Blue shifts, too, turning a bit on his side while winding arms around Yzak, pulling him close to him. it may seem as though he means to dodge that thoughtful stare, but really, he just wants hold him and be held, as though it would impress the tactile memory of the moment onto his body.]
Warm. Tired. Empty, but...not at all... [he puffs a little laugh in his exhale.] How do I even explain...
[ He lets Blue lead there to dictate position so he's most comfortable, seemingly weightless as he moves easily along with him. Like this Yzak's able to drape that arm around his thin body properly now, holding Blue back like he wishes to be and pressing close to him. ]
That wasn't too bad. [ That explanation. And he gets what he means, empty but not at all ... that particular kind of fullness is what he feels, too, still warm and next to him like this, reluctant to part and not even because of the cold. Yzak still feels a slight heat in his cheeks that only grows when Blue lets out that small, breathy laugh. ]
[Blue hums a little, nuzzling his face against Yzak's neck. even his thought comes as a sleepy mumble:] Maybe...just a little. But I think...that's how it has to be. To properly embrace...
[or maybe not. how would he know for certain? all he'd ever gleaned before were the emotional highs, not the physical ones.
while clutching Yzak a little tighter:] I know I'm grateful. To feel this... How am I to...dream of anything else?
[ Blue gets to feel him handle that in real time. The mix of concern and respect trying to settle somewhere fair. This was ... nice. No, this was great, and Yzak is glad they were able to explore some of those limits for Blue together without any issues. He knows he'd hate to have to stop if he were in Blue's position, because he hates leaving anything half-finished, understands some of the frustration - so he gets it. Respects it. Still. ]
Okay.
[ Though he gives a gentle little poke to Blue's back to emphasize when he continues. ] Just don't over-do it, then, or I'll kick your ass! Stopping, or just ... this. I'm fine with it. [ It's not as though he of all people can chastise anyone for pushing themselves a little.
Feeling Blue's steady breathing against his neck gets him to curl in a little closer. When he speaks of dreaming, Yzak feels both awkward but praised. ]
W-why do you think I had that dream before in the first place? [ This is exactly why. ]
I'm ... likewise glad in that case that it was ... good. For you. [ Because his easily bruisable little ego and lack of experience make him constantly assess and hope he's not absolutely terrible at this shit. ]
[ Blue will feel him pull in a slow, deep breath at that. This sort of vulnerability, a connection he's never had before ... Yzak feels those things, too. ]
In either case, [ regarding his own vulnerability that Yzak offers back, as well as with Blue's keeping proper tabs on his limits, ] I trust you. [ He has no reason not to. Look where they are now thanks to that, he thinks. Thanks the fact that Yzak finally... ]
...
And I guess it is natural. But I'm glad I didn't turn my back to it this time like I always did before. To ... this. This kind of connection. [ Because he's never had it before, either. Imagine having missed out on all of this, just because he was scared? Fear still lingers naturally, doubt still hangs. But ... everything, even this, can't be completely free of those things. ] Despite ... everything.
[Blue moves only to be able to kiss his neck, nuzzle it.]
Despite everything, yes. [after all, look where they are! hardly a dream. but still... maybe where they are is just as good a reason as any, and maybe connecting like this helps keep them from despairing alone.
he withdraws to let his head rest on the blanket and be able to look Yzak eye to eye, slipping one of his arms back from around him so he can caress his face.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
no subject
I can also say...I am grateful. I can share feelings...and a moment like this. With you.
[sincerity that continues to just bulldoze Yzak's cool-guy walls is punctuated with a gentle kiss that gradually deepens in an effort to impress that very sincerity onto him. that seems to be key with humans, securing that trust - trust that doesn't come from the resonance of minds, but of bodies and hearts.]
no subject
His chest only feels lighter when he has no choice but to look back into those eyes, hear those words that set so deeply into his heart that he can't help but simultaneously feel pulled in more and frightened of that pull. He's not going to be able to turn away from it at all soon.
But does he want to in the first place? No, he hasn't from the beginning. But the path before him still seems so endless, while when he looks behind him, he's so far in that he can't see the start of it anymore. He keeps facing forward.
Yzak shuts his eye, accepting that impression of sincerity and thinking I am, too as he returns both Blue's sentiments and kiss. He can stay, doing this for a long time (just as Blue said himself, before), but right now, with those words still fresh in his mind, his body still feeling so good and so warm, he wants to do more. With Blue. For Blue. Only you. He breaks the kiss and reaches to take his hand, pulling it up to press his lips gently against the back of it. ]
H-here. [ And then he tugs at that hand, urging Blue to move along with him - easing him back, intent to see more of him, taste more of him, more than just his lips and his neck. He'll let Blue decide where he's most comfortable, sitting up against the wall? On his back? Yzak's the more flexible one here. But once settled, he slides his hands back up under Blue's shirt to bring it up, while he slides his own body down, leaning in to kiss lightly just under his (very ... noticeable) ribs. ]
no subject
despite efforts to stifle himself, Blue grunts in discomfort, holding up a hand when alarm rears its head.]
It's...alright. Just--help me situate, please. [because laying back this put his legs in an awkward position, so he just needs to adjust that.] ...There... [he exhales, flashing Yzak a reassuring smile, reaching to touch his face again.]
Not really something to think about...in a good dream...
no subject
Yzak looks back up at him when he caresses his face. ]
I'd much rather have this than a dream.
[ He states that with the matter-of-fact tone he usually takes. And that'd even sound smooth but of course he immediately ruins it when he eases back toward him, tentative hand moving to rest at his bared waist as he mutters, pink. ]
I - I've just never done any of this before! So ... bear with me and tell me if I fuck something up. Or if I'm not... doing something right. Enough. Aaaagh you know what I mean!
I want ... you to feel good, to be happy, too.
no subject
What a coincidence...neither have I! [he exhales, relaxing back against Yzak's jacket and the blanket, fingers grazing at what bit of Yzak he can reach from here.]
no subject
The hand at his waist slides lower, fingers gently caressing over his hip bone, lingering much like his lips do when he returns to re-press a warm kiss beneath, and then slowly, very slowly, up his ribs, wishing to feel, please, know every part of Blue. ]
no subject
Worked up...like you were...
no subject
He doesn't want to drag this on for too long lest Blue starts to tire. Truth be told, he's feeling a bit impatient himself. The little noises and gasps of breath coming from Blue are both something he wants to hear as much as possible and something that coaxes Yzak to give him what he wants.
So the hand resting at his hip slips forward and lower, eye raising to peek at Blue and watch his reaction when that hand singly starts to undo the front of his pants. ]
no subject
[the air is chill, but Yzak is warm; each kiss or touch leaves a trail of tingling comfort to combat that chill. he can brace and hold an expectant breath, going still while his pants are undone, shifting up when they’re pulled at… he lets out that breath in a sigh when his erection is free, shuddering again.
he relaxes, face flush and expression hazy, toeing the line between exhaustion and expectation. it’s one thing to have felt those feelings emotionally alone, but it’s another to be subject to what the body brings to that table: that ache, the fluttering of his stomach, the racing of his heart…all amplified in simply opening dewy eyes to see Yzak again.]
no subject
Yzak shifts as he moves and kisses back down Blue's body, over his abdomen and finally down to his dick. Taking it in his hand, he gives him a couple of full, slow strokes. And then with some fluster and small beat of timidness, of self-appraisal, he presses parted lips and tongue against it. Of course, said self-appraisal is because like Yzak said earlier, he's definitely never done this! And never betraying who he is, he wants to be good at everything he does. ]
no subject
oh.]
Ah...!
[the sensation of Yzak's mouth on him sends a stronger rush of urgency that is startling...and thrilling. it takes his breath away, makes his skin prickle and his dick ache. why in heaven's name was he apprehensive a moment ago? did he know this would have such a reaction?
after a bit of eye fluttering and a caught breath:] Oh, that... Incredible...!
no subject
mister dick wizard hereHe immediately wants more of that. So without needing to be urged back to it, Yzak's head dips back down to repeat that first motion in the same place. Lips and tongue linger for longer this time, before moving them down Blue's dick and listening intently for a response. That's what he aims for first, noting what evokes the most impassioned noises out of him. Be it a certain way he moves his tongue or how softly he presses his lips against skin. But through that, he recalls what he said earlier, about wanting to know if he's doing too much or too little, or if it's... ]
Enough?
[ Is it?
Ah, they can communicate while he does this, too. That's ... a little less cute than the smooching thing. ]
no subject
it's very good, though, though it does make for some scattered thoughts while he's in the trenches here.]
So warm...all over... And when you press-- [his breath hitches with a whimper, forearms lifting and fingers curling for lack of any other thing they can do.]
Is this...really...what it's like...?
[gee i dunno Blue you are kind of in it right now. and even though it starts to become a struggle to be taking more labored breaths, and even though his head is starting to ache as this goes on. it can't go on for too long, though.]
Yzak... Hurry...
no subject
Hurry. He knows what Blue means by that plead (as hot as it'd be otherwise). The way he squirms and moans against the way Yzak works his mouth is a pretty good indicator that he can't be far off from climax. So,
And when you press
he defers to what he managed to pick up as coaxing the best reactions out of Blue, to give him what he wants here. He lets out an affirmative little ahh in response to his ask, breath hot against the head of Blue's cock. Doing as enjoyed, Yzak presses lips and tongue back against him, pulling them down and very lightly sucking at his skin. His hand, too, occasionally gives a soft, urging squeeze, stroking down and then back up to glide his thumb over the tip of the head and repeat. ]
no subject
[even if he wanted to stop himself, he's past that point when one more stroke, one more suck renders resistance futile. Blue succumbs before he can warn him, overtaken by the rush that comes with a gasp and a slight arching of his back, held for a beat before he can exhale and untense in its subsiding. his heart still drums and his head still swims, and his body trembles, awash in that pulsing satisfaction that makes the dream pale in comparison.
few things compare to the real thing, after all.
is it...really this intense? always? it's...overwhelming; rarely has Blue felt so vulnerable in being laid bare and exposed to someone, but that has always been emotionally, mentally. not like this. there's layers here he's not known before, not even in dreaming first- or second-hand.
intense...and so strangely fleeting, even when glimmers of that sensation linger under his skin and ache as they do.]
no subject
Yzak lifts his head, hand wet down and between a couple of his fingers (begrudgingly) letting go of Blue. He gives the side of his leg a small, grateful squeeze as he pushes, braces himself with a hand to half sit up, gazing up to Blue and giving him a moment to catch his breath. He feels somewhat entranced when he watches that, the rise and fall of his chest slowing as he calms. ]
no subject
eventually he does feel Yzak's attention on him (when has it left?!), his arms reach out for him.]
no subject
Drawn in by those arms, he sits up completely between Blue's legs, feeling a twinge at his side when he twists slightly in a certain way. But ignoring it for what he'd rather feel instead, Yzak's careful as he crawls up and into those arms, one of his own bracing so he doesn't put his full weight down when he does. The chill of the night is going to set in again, they need to rebundle up for it, but right now he just wants to feel this for the tiniest bit longer. He dips his head down closer to stare at Blue. ]
How are you feeling?
[ A double sided question. The care in that thought, though, makes it clear that Yzak's priority is Blue himself rather than what they just did. ]
no subject
Warm. Tired. Empty, but...not at all... [he puffs a little laugh in his exhale.] How do I even explain...
no subject
That wasn't too bad. [ That explanation. And he gets what he means, empty but not at all ... that particular kind of fullness is what he feels, too, still warm and next to him like this, reluctant to part and not even because of the cold. Yzak still feels a slight heat in his cheeks that only grows when Blue lets out that small, breathy laugh. ]
I'm glad you didn't have to push it.
no subject
[or maybe not. how would he know for certain? all he'd ever gleaned before were the emotional highs, not the physical ones.
while clutching Yzak a little tighter:] I know I'm grateful. To feel this... How am I to...dream of anything else?
no subject
Okay.
[ Though he gives a gentle little poke to Blue's back to emphasize when he continues. ] Just don't over-do it, then, or I'll kick your ass! Stopping, or just ... this. I'm fine with it. [ It's not as though he of all people can chastise anyone for pushing themselves a little.
Feeling Blue's steady breathing against his neck gets him to curl in a little closer. When he speaks of dreaming, Yzak feels both awkward but praised. ]
W-why do you think I had that dream before in the first place? [ This is exactly why. ]
I'm ... likewise glad in that case that it was ... good. For you. [ Because his easily bruisable little ego and lack of experience make him constantly assess and hope he's not absolutely terrible at this shit. ]
no subject
I won't know the limit right away. Neither would you... [his head lifts a little, lips lingering on Yzak's shoulder.]
I'm not used to it. Feeling...vulnerable like this. Not in danger, but... Taking on a connection...I never had before.
Fear of the unknown...it's only natural, I suppose.
no subject
In either case, [ regarding his own vulnerability that Yzak offers back, as well as with Blue's keeping proper tabs on his limits, ] I trust you. [ He has no reason not to. Look where they are now thanks to that, he thinks. Thanks the fact that Yzak finally... ]
...
And I guess it is natural. But I'm glad I didn't turn my back to it this time like I always did before. To ... this. This kind of connection. [ Because he's never had it before, either. Imagine having missed out on all of this, just because he was scared? Fear still lingers naturally, doubt still hangs. But ... everything, even this, can't be completely free of those things. ] Despite ... everything.
no subject
Despite everything, yes. [after all, look where they are! hardly a dream. but still... maybe where they are is just as good a reason as any, and maybe connecting like this helps keep them from despairing alone.
he withdraws to let his head rest on the blanket and be able to look Yzak eye to eye, slipping one of his arms back from around him so he can caress his face.]
Thank you...for accepting me. Like this.
(no subject)